Thursday, September 16, 2010

If you don't like feminism, antipornography, or the word "fuck" you should read this

Stopping big corporations from their funding and revenue feels unrealistic to me. The pornography industry is a multi-million dollar bank role, how fast and how long will we have to put pressure on the big companies before there is change? I don't foresee that anyone will be able to take down an industry that has become so big and powerful across the world. It has men hooked, investors are cashing in, and women are trying to live up to the porn stars that their significant others are getting off to. Everyone is involved, and I can protest Video-entertainment-dvd-blue ray-gaming Mart and its affiliates, but that will only effect, what, not even ten bucks of the money made from porn? A CEO in the technology world could take her company and refuse to market any affiliation of the porn industry, but she will take her empire, her employees, and her investors out in the same way that Sony tanked Betamax. So if I can't do anything and CEO Bigbucks can't do anything, then let's focus on something we can do. Focus on the women. How do we change the way a woman perceives herself? If a man goes home to his wife every day and she isn't laying on the kitchen table with just bologna covering her bits, then she isn't justifying the way pornography portrays her: as a meat loving housewife. Women cannot define their sexuality as the way they see sexy in magazines, on television, and in the porn their husbands watch. It is not okay for a woman to believe that to seduce her husband she has to conform to all of the bologna.

I watched a Gail Dines lecture from her website, I don't know if it was "Pornography and Pop Culture", but something that she said triggered such a strong, shameful feeling in me that it inspired me to go off on this rampage. All she said was "Fuck me" and I went into a complete mental overhaul of the image I have built for myself. Fuck me shoes, fuck me jeans. My initial thought was, what the Hell happened to my sophisticated, classy wardrobe? When really, I don't wear outlandish outfits from the lingerie shop at all, but I found myself realizing that pornography and media sexual portrayal made me feel like to be sexy and appealing, this is the way I have to stereotype myself. I could have on my most decent and modest funeral clothes, but I would still be wearing my "fuck me" shape wear. It's the way that I, personally, classify what I wear. I don't believe that other people are thinking, "Oh, she is wearing her 'fuck me' pearls to work today," it's all in my screwed up perception of reality. Believe me, I just had this realization today and I will probably wear trash bags for the next five years just to deprogram myself. Who told me that this is how I should think? The magazines that I've been devouring since middle school. Television personalities definitely aren't calling things "fuck me" but they are definitely wearing the same things that I see in those magazines. I built myself a shrine of those damn identity traps, and it feels JUST AS BAD as the men that devour Playboy, Penthouse, and Hustler. Young, developing women are viewing the exact same ideologies that I did growing up, except there are a few articles nowadays about how plus size women can look sexy. Good for them, but girls are still going to grow into their independent style with stupid phrases like "fuck me pumps". When in actuality, to purchase a legitimate "fuck me pump", one would have to go to Sex World and get a pair of seven inch, see through, platforms. Seven inch, see through, platform. That's what my next door neighbor's deck looks like...

Someone correct me if they think I've got the wrong idea, but this feels fucked up, not "fuck me". I had this self evaluating experience today, and I realized that I have done exactly what I have been programmed to do. It is a terrible feeling. These magazines, Cosmopolitian specifically, are they written to train young girls to act like raunchy porn stars? Really? When Gail Dines says "soft core has migrated into pop culture" is this what she is talking about? "His burning sex need, sex positions, seduce him, sex during your period, sex poll, sex tips from guys (sizzling, sinful, and surprising things they're craving now), look so sexy, girl traits no man can resist, orgasm guaranteed, sex up your eyes..." FOR WHO? Who are we sexing up our eyes for? Definitely not ourselves because on the same page it says "speak his sex language". I used to love reading my monthly Cosmo. My sex magazine. But I never thought of it as a sex magazine. It wasn't until now, at 20 years old, that I realize what Cosmopolitian really is. A 15 year old should not be able to purchase a sex object training guide before they can hold a legitimate paying job or drive a car. Let's shop around for a more supportive magazine... something where we can learn to cook for our men instead of fuck for them... Or maybe the cover celebrities who young women look up to can put their clothes back on and support their fellow females. Look at Reese Witherspoon, have you seen her in her underwear lately? No, she is a big supporter of Avon's empowerment movement. Reese Witherspoon does not show up on the cover of Cosmo anymore, and I wonder why... hah.

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