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Wednesday, February 16, 2011

How to Find a Book at Half Price Books

The truth is, you don't.

I've been looking for The Omnivore's Dilemma for almost six months at my local Half- Price Books store and I haven't found it once. Yes, at one point in the six months I came across enough money to buy myself 45 new copies of the book in hardcover and a yacht, but I prefer used books solely for the sake of someone else's snotty fingers dog ear-ing all of the pages before me. Recently, I gave up leisure reads for highlighting textbooks. But, in light of my recent obsession with stalking The Amatuer Gourmet for updates every ten minutes, I went back to Half Price Books to find Adam's book which is properly named The Amatuer Gourmet ... I wonder where he came up with that??? Funny thing, I didn't find the book. I scanned every isle that it could be in (Those discount book stores are really sneaky. I found Eat, Pray, Love in the marriage section once) but to no avail. What I did find, though, was The Omnivore's Dilemma. They say that you find love when you least expect it. Tonight has proven that I can apply that rule to my entire life, and I will, which is why I have discontinued all attempts to located my bellybutton. I will find it when I least expect it.

Today, I also learned how to create a link. How elementary of me, but I've noticed that a successful blogger links EVERYTHING.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Lazy Sunday When Minneapolis is Slush

If you ever have a lazy day when you don't want to exercise throw on some comfy, fashionista clothes and hit up the Minneapolis Institute of Arts in South Minneapolis. Free admission, with donations accepted, the museum is a good way to relax and burn off some of that skinny no whip vanilla latte that you've been slamming all your life. Art is also good for wiping the sludge off your brain (except for the "Erotic Plates" from Korea... don't forget your glasses or you'll miss the teeny tiny phallic details on centuries old ceramic) I missed the Venetian paintings because I started getting tired by the time I got to the 3rd floor. Too much drinky drinky the night before for how much walky walky I did, luckily they have a coffee shop that sells beer. sil vous plait!! I'll probably go back this week to check out the Venetian paintings from Scotland; it's Scottish and it makes me feel inches closer to Craig Ferguson. Delicious.

I suggest, if you are a 20 something like myself and you have a fantasy of meeting the love of your life at the Goya painting, that you go on a weekday.... Or any day that isn't an elementary school teacher workshop/weekend. Shrouds of loud kids clomping around in their boots kind of ruins the peacefulness of the Buddha statues on the second floor. An art student friend of my suggested between 3-5 or else getting away from the excess noise would mean hiding in the modern art galleries for three hours. Other than annoyed bitches like myself, the museum is really children friendly. I will take my sisters some day so I can pretend like I know everything about art interpretation.

My favorite section is the Asian parts of the world. I'm not trying to turn into a manga loving, white face painting wannabe, but I really appreciate the beauty and the air of delicacy that surrounds the sacred practices of the historic dynasties. You don't find any anime cluttering the MIA walls. The Japanese art shows a significant change in their development as an independent country with paintings and screens that shows a shift from depicting other countries to embracing their own landscape. You can also see the greater care that they put into their possessions from their wardrobe to their enchanting pottery pieces. I just wish they would have let me try on the kimono...

When you leave the MIA you will find yourself fantasizing about being an art curator. Don't quit your day job. We can't all be Charlotte York from Sex and the City. Go buy a slice of pizza and call it a day.